Why Actors Should Stop Being Told “Not to Take It Personally”

I recently heard someone say that certain things hurt her. She feels sad, stressed, and shaken when someone treats her unfairly—when someone is rude, angry, or dismissive.

The response she received was simple: “Just don’t take it personally.”

As if it were that easy. As if emotional impact were a choice.

This kind of advice is common, especially in demanding environments—workplaces, creative industries, and even acting training. We are often told that strength means distance and that professionalism means emotional detachment.

The Importance of Sensitivity in Acting

But for actors, the opposite is true.

As actors, the way forward is to take things personally. Not to dramatise or indulge, but to feel. We must notice what happens in our bodies when something lands. We need to stay present with the sensation instead of shutting it down.

Acting doesn’t start with technique or performance. It starts with sensitivity. Our instrument is our nervous system, our perception, and our ability to register impact and respond truthfully. When we learn to ignore what hurts, we don’t become stronger—we become less available.

The Consequences of Suppressed Emotions

Emotions that are suppressed don’t disappear. They get stored. Over time, they block our instrument. They show up as tension, exhaustion, disconnection, or even physical symptoms. A body that isn’t allowed to feel cannot remain open, responsive, or free.

This doesn’t mean being overwhelmed by every emotion. It means learning to pause, to name what is present, and to hold space for it.

Sensitivity is not a flaw to correct. It is a skill to protect.

The Misunderstanding of Toughness

Actors are often encouraged to “toughen up,” to grow a thicker skin. But toughness, when misunderstood, leads to numbness. And numbness is the enemy of truthful acting.

What we actually need are boundaries, not armour. Awareness, not suppression.

So no—don’t stop taking things personally. Learn how to take them consciously.

Embracing Emotional Availability

Be emotionally available. Be clear about your limits. Protect your sensitivity without shutting it down.

Because, as actors, we don’t train ourselves to feel less. We train ourselves to feel with awareness.

That’s not a weakness. That’s craft.

The Journey of an Actor

The journey of an actor is deeply personal. It involves navigating the complex landscape of emotions. Each experience shapes us, adding layers to our craft.

When we embrace our feelings, we open ourselves to richer performances. We connect more deeply with our characters and our audience.

Finding Your Voice

Finding your voice as an actor means being true to yourself. It requires vulnerability and courage. It’s about expressing your unique perspective.

In this process, we learn to trust ourselves. We discover the power of our stories.

The Role of Performance Coaching

Performance coaching plays a vital role in this journey. It helps us refine our skills and build confidence. A good coach guides us in exploring our emotions. They teach us how to channel our feelings into our performances.

Through coaching, we learn techniques to manage our emotional responses. We develop tools to express ourselves clearly and confidently.

The Impact of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is crucial for actors. It allows us to understand our emotions and those of others. This understanding enhances our performances.

When we connect with our emotions, we create authentic moments on stage or screen. Our audience feels our truth, and that connection is powerful.

Building Resilience

Resilience is another essential quality for actors. The industry can be challenging, filled with rejection and criticism. Building resilience helps us navigate these obstacles.

We learn to bounce back from setbacks. We develop a mindset that embraces growth and learning.

Conclusion: The Heart of Acting

In conclusion, the heart of acting lies in our ability to feel. It’s about embracing our sensitivity and using it as a strength.

By taking things personally, we open ourselves to a world of possibilities. We become more than just performers; we become storytellers.

Let’s celebrate our emotions and the craft of acting. Together, we can create art that resonates and inspires.